Posts Tagged ‘target’
Thursday, May 28th, 2015
How to Handle An Office Bully
By Arlene Dawson, Essence Magazine, June 2015
When brainy go-getter Nicole*, 28, accepted a position at a trendy beauty start-up in New York City, she thought it was her dream job. “The company promoted itself as being progressive,” says Nicole. But her work situation devolved quickly and became more Mean Girls than The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.
Early on, when Nicole wasn’t dancing at a company party, a White coworker said to her, “You’re Black. We hired you because you could dance.” Other colleagues laughed. “I always thought that if this type of thing happened I would come back with a response, but I went to the bathroom and cried,” Nicole recalls. “I had never experienced those types of comments—racism—so blatantly in a work setting before.”
Nicole reported the incident to her immediate boss and her complaint got laddered up to the CEO. Although her superiors feigned remorse, she says, “That was the beginning of the end for me in the company.” The bully got promoted, found out Nicole “told on her” and escalated the bullying. During staff meetings, Nicole says her ideas were met with coldness; the bully rallied other coworkers not to associate with her; and more negative remarks—this time about Nicole’s naturally curly hair and clothing—ensued.
Even management turned sour, setting her up for failure by assigning impossible, vague projects. And despite Nicole’s management of million-dollar accounts, she recalls work review meetings being filled with nitpicky, unfounded accusations. “They were systematically trying to push me out without actually firing me,” says Nicole.
Tags: advice, Arlene Dawson, bully, Essence Magazine, Gary Namie, target, workplace bullying, Workplace Bullying Institute
Posted in Media About Bullying, Print: News, Blogs, Magazines, Tutorials About Bullying, WBI Education, WBI in the News | 1 Archived Comment | Post A Comment (
Saturday, August 2nd, 2014
Tags: Gary Namie, got a minute, NFL, target, who gets bullied, workplace bullying, Workplace Bullying Institute
Posted in Commentary by G. Namie, Media About Bullying, NFL: Jonathan Martin, WBI Education | No Archived Comments | Post A Comment (
Thursday, January 30th, 2014
Jonathan Martin, Miami Dolphins offensive lineman, left the team in October, 2013. His voluntary decision to leave an “abusive environment” caused a firestorm of controversy in the sports world. On January 29, 2014, Martin spoke publicly for the first time about his ordeal with former NFL coach, now NBC sports broadcaster Tony Dungy.
Listen for his distinction between cruelty required on the field and character off the field. Exactly what Richard Sherman described as his “switch.”
Follow the full NFL story in the Category list in the sidebar: NFL: Jonathan Martin
Tags: abuse, bullying, Jonathan Martin, Miami Dolphins, NFL, target, Tony Dungy
Posted in Broadcasts: Video, TV, radio, webinars, Employers Gone Wild: Doing Bad Things, Media About Bullying, NFL: Jonathan Martin, Target Tale, WBI Education | No Archived Comments | Post A Comment (
Tuesday, October 22nd, 2013
By Michael De Groote
Ron McMillan must have seemed like the perfect target to the three workers on an assembly line in Clearfield, Utah. McMillian had just finished his first year at college in the summer of 1971 and looked clean-cut, nice and perhaps naïve. So they bullied him.
“They’d do things like when I sat down at lunch — while I was eating, they would distract me,” he says. “Then they’d pour motor oil on my sandwich.”
They were relentless. They mocked him. They put him down.
“Words do hurt,” he says. “They do damage.”
That was when McMillan was, as he says, “quite young.” The experience helped stir an interest in workplace bullying. Now, at 61, he is the co-author of the national best-seller “Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High” and cofounder of VitalSmarts, an organizational consulting firm based in Provo, Utah. He is also part of a large demographic. Various studies place the percentage of people who have been bullied at work between 30 and 37 percent.
Monday, August 26th, 2013
At WBI we want to know more about the nature of workplaces where bullying occurs.
If have ever been a target of workplace bullying, or are currently struggling with a bully at work, please take a moment to fill this out.
Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
It began as a dream job, taking care of disabled children in a home, hospital, school setting. The pay was average but finally had adequate insurance for me and my three children. I had been a widow about a year.
The first day outside of training I was ignored by a teammate. It was overlooked as a bad day for her. Within hours of my first few days off, I was told by another employee they thought I had quit and couldn’t believe I came back. My first clue! As time went on it became a mobbing event. I was ostracized, ridiculed, yelled at, etc. I helped everyone despite the cruelties.
After visiting HR on several occasions to warn them of fear of physical abuse, and requesting to be moved to another facility, a chair was pulled out from me causing physical injury. I then filed a grievance and workman’s comp claim. This stirred some administrators who then began their bullying tactics. I was then terminated, while under their workman’s doctor care.
I couldn’t file a bullying case, so I filed a wrongful termination case. I suffered a physical and mental breakdown as well as a financial breakdown. Thank goodness I had gained the knowledge to file with the EEOC (You see, I had been sexually harassed 21 years prior by a male manager and learned a little lesson). An attorney was hired and we filed a wrongful termination case, which has been in the works for several years now. While recovering, I was able to draw unemployment before returning back to work. Of course it was for another employer.
It has been an exhausting roller coaster ride and although I will never fully recover, I have gained much insight into the mind games of bullies. I advocate, meditate, and appreciate as much as I’m able. My youngest son has autism and I was hoping with that particular job, to get him some help as well. What a disappointment since that is their business! Life goes on for them but it stopped us in our tracks.
Legislation is a must! My belief is more families are harmed by workplace bullying than any other hazard known. The safety and environmental specialists have missed the boat on this. Thank you for educating those who haven’t had to endure the harsh reality of workplace bullying as well as those who have!
Monday, July 1st, 2013
FIRST-TIME ABUSERS IN BULLIED TARGETS’ LIVES
WBI 2013-H Instant Poll
Prior life experiences play a role in the depth of emotional injury that bullying can cause a person. Individuals who have never been abused in their lives may take longer to recognize that they are actually being bullied. Without memories or repressed cognitive representations of being the victim of abuse, bullying is a completely novel experience. Learning begins when first targeted for the first time in their lives.
Targets with prior brushes with abuse in their lives do not necessarily risk being targets of workplace bullying. However, when targeted, emotional memories are quickly triggered and those targets are subject to re-traumatization. The levels of emotional pain, shame and distress are much more severe than for individuals experiencing abuse for the first time as an adult in the workplace.
This single-question survey sought to ascertain what percentage of bullied targets were recipients of abusive conduct for the first time in their lives and who are the perpetrators.
Monday, October 8th, 2012
Let me be clear. There are not “2 sides” to this story. Bullying is not conflict of an intellectual nature between two people with equivalent power.
Bullying is an uninvited, unwanted assault that is initiated unilaterally. Sometimes by committee as when there are several perpetrators. But it is never started at the invitation of the targeted person.
It’s assault, a non-physical series of repeated attacks. It stops short of battery, physical contact. But it is a form of workplace violence. The cruelest bullies are innovative. They are harmful but rarely are held accountable. Instead, targets are blamed for their fate and held responsible. Strange?
Friday, March 16th, 2012
It’s been a relatively quiet week here at WBI. Dr. Namie is traveling and, aside from some activity in Canada, there’s not much media about workplace bullying. We couldn’t finish the week without reaching out to all of you, so I thought I would try to explain why you are being bullied.